this morning i dreamt. while awake, i imagined a new reality that exists all the time if we only choose to notice it.
in this space i've lost my identity. i'm not hayley, the woman with all her hopes and fears, i'm no one and everyone. i'm watching it all with supreme awe and amazement, like a child. everything around me breathes: the plants, the dirt, the insects, the rocks, the buildings, other people. it all pulses and vibrates together like a song. i can't find where i end and space begins, the lines between us are erased and we are just particles all here right now. i am born and i die, over and over again. i'm afraid of nothing because i can't feel the emotions, i can only watch them like an observer.
i walk around like this, in a wonderland, stopping to look at water on a branch for what feels like an hour. everything is so extraordinarily gorgeous. i look at other people and see we are exactly the same. we're all visitors living in a body for a while, until we go back into another particle collection and live there in some other beautiful form. we are born, we die, we are born again. i keep seeing this natural process. and i love everyone and everything because we are no different from each other.
slowly, i begin to come down. i can sense hayley again. i see her waiting for me to return to her and we can reunite in consciousness. but now i see her differently. she needs protecting from herself, she needs me, this higher view, to keep her safe. i can't let her habitual thought patterns block me out completely. why would she let herself tell her Self those things, those thoughts of fear and worry? she needs me to tell her she's beautiful, happy, and has nothing to be afraid of. i'm always here for you... i whisper as we merge again.
i am hayley again. i feel so warm, like nothing can hurt me. there is no urgency, nothing needs to be done, no thoughts need to be mulled over. there's only now. it feels like a lovely summer night with the windows open, laying in bed, listening to van morrison, with all the people i love around me. i have nothing but compassion for myself and others. i know with this mindset, with help and guidance from my higher self, i can't go wrong. i can handle it all. life and death are the same, pain and pleasure are like waves that will forever flow through time.
we are all one, exchanging air and life freely in this moment. why do i forget? i just need to take a trip, and be reminded of who we are. my dream is real.