lucky.

the past couple days really have me thinking, or remembering, just how lucky i am.  i'm warm, have healthy good food to eat, plenty of work to do, and lots of positive loving people around me.

at the same time, life is SO unfair.  i lucked out, that's all there is to it.  i didn't do anything to deserve to be born when i was or be given the opportunities that i have.

there are so many others in the world that did not get lucky, and sometimes the reality of this is too much to bear.

i watched the amazing film 'baraka' last night and got a much needed glimpse of how most of the world lives.  i haven't traveled to another country in about 5 years now (at least not a 3rd world country- canada doesn't count!), and honestly i am craving that perspective adjustment traveling gives you.

in my sparse travels from what now feels like lifetimes ago, i experienced that constant restart of my internal system. in my early 20's i traveled to the south pacific- samoa, fiji, and american samoa for 3 or 4 months, and then to todos santos, mexico to yandara yoga school for a month.  i've only seen like an inch of this globe, but that inch was enough to refresh my memory of how good we have it here in america.

yes of course america has many problems, but still we are quite sheltered here for the most part.  i've never seen a dead body on the street, i've never seen starvation, we have hot showers, we have whole foods and salads!, we treat our dogs like members of our families.  i know my dog lives better than about 75% of the world.

and it's just not fair.  it sucks and it pains me that i get to live well while others sleep on the streets and beg for food.

watching baraka, i felt like i got to travel a bit again last night.  i felt that uneasiness with the inequalities of the world that i felt while studying abroad, and i almost wanted to be able to experience life like that to know how it feels.  damn, i know it must feel just terrible; but perhaps if we americans could feel what it's like to live in a tribe that's land is being taken, or live without electricity or walls to separate us, or work at a chicken factory farm, or beg for food on the streets, maybe we could lessen that gap of inequality somehow.

i don't even know how that would be possible, but i wish so badly i could stop this whole luckiness and unluckiness thing.  i hope with all that i have that my business, purusha, will be able to bring a little luck to those less fortunate.  i dream of running a transparent big business that isn't in it just for the profits.  i really hope to change the standards of the fashion industry, and encourage consumers to demand clothes made in humane conditions.  just like we are seeing more and more people demand to know what's in their food and where it comes from, similarly i hope we begin that same want to know where are clothes fibers are grown, who makes them, and what kinds of conditions they are made in.

our lives here are so short compared to the span of time, and i long for my life to provide something even minisculely positive to future generations.

perhaps soon i will be able to travel again, and maybe even sooner i can start making some changes with the luck i've been given.

the light in me bows to the light in you.