beyond positive thinking.

I've been working pretty hard recently on my positive thinking. And actually trying to go beyond positive thinking and into reality thinking. Each morning last week I read and meditated on my thoughts, on what I believe is my world. Life is only what we are conscious of, we experience what we are convinced is real. That's why we are all different. The world is actually the same, we're for the most part anatomically identical as humans, but how we view life allows the world to be different for each of us.

I kinda got to the point where I was just feeling fed up with floating along, allowing my emotions to guide me blindly. Waking up, checking email, spending time on social media... Getting jealous, stressing out on work, comparing myself to others, wishing I had more or was further along. Just feeling bad often. It's a scientific fact that we remember negative experiences more deeply than positive ones, so it's truly going to be a daily effort for the rest of my life to not let the bad stuff pull me under without me even noticing. You have to put the time in on the mind, just like I put the time in each day to exercise my body. Because, I just really want to feel good. Plain and simple, it's time to feel good.

The mind is SO powerful, and the universe is neutral. It will all flow on with or without me. I can choose to go down the river of life crying and worrying, or I can go down it with health and abundance. We receive only what we believe we are worthy of. The river is always there with as much or as little water as we accept we deserve.

The subconscious mind exists to make the conscious mind right. It doesn't question if something is true or not, it just follows instructions from the conscious mind. If I don't even realize what my conscious mind is thinking about on a daily basis, how can I begin to change my life from the inside out? If my conscious mind tells my self I can't do something, my subconscious will seek justification and ignore opportunities to make it otherwise.

In words this stuff just seems like common sense, but it's hands down the absolute hardest thing to do. This is why I adore characters like Darth Vader, and my Dad. (Haha, because they're so alike!) But seriously, to change the very foundation of who you are, and drop beliefs you once held so strongly because you understand changing will lead you to a life that's free... Well, that's a miracle. Rewiring your mind is nothing short of a miracle. It's uncomfortable, it's a lot of work, it makes you face parts of yourself you'd just rather bury.

But you get to the point where your view of the world is hurting more than it will hurt you to change. It's the craziest thing, but if you just start telling yourself who you want to be, you can become it. Each day I say to myself,

"It's like me to laugh easily."
"It's like me to support all the people around me in whatever they're doing, and not judge where someone else is on their journey."
"It's not like me to compare myself to others."
"It's like me to love instinctively and not worry if I get it back."

At first when I told myself things I thought were lies, like too good to be true, I just laughed. But say something enough times, and you start to see that you like it. You like this person and want to be her. You believe in her, and your subconscious begins seeking opportunities to validate this lovely person.

The key though is daily discipline. I have to keep this up and never look back. I'm not looking back.