a canyon lady.

a friend of mine reminded me of this song... oh how i love joni, and i love the canyon.

hope your weekend is wonder filled and peaceful!

my 'hood.

here are some shots from my daily run around the neighborhood. the runs here are freakin' tough!! hilly, high altitudes, but they make for a good workout. it's definitely gorgeous here, and sometimes i need to snap some photos to remind myself how lucky i am. enjoy!

the beginning of my run.

the last hill sucks. haha.

xo.

feeling more like home.

i love time. it heals, it restores, it creates wisdom. and it makes things familiar...

patrick, liam, and i have lived in california for 7 1/2 months, and i'm beginning to feel like i actually belong here a bit more than before. i used to be afraid- of the roads, of all the strangers, of how much bigger everything is, of the unknown. i didn't know how to get anywhere without mapping it on my phone and i felt like driving through LA was a small piece of hell. i got nervous meeting people (should i ask them for their contact info so we can be friends?! i need friends!) and felt really isolated. i didn't feel all that confident about launching myself, my brand, and my vision here. i was full of doubt.

the beginning is always the hardest part. the start of a long run, tackling a project, taking up a new hobby; man i have so much respect for the beginner! 'cause in the beginning you have to fight. and things are challenging so they're not really fun yet.

but the beginning is now beginning to fade into the now, the moments of easiness are returning. i actually noticed it for the first time last week driving home from the fashion district, and my hands weren't their usual sweaty selves on the wheel. i felt relaxed, like i was driving on my turf. even the stupid traffic felt ok, because it felt like it was mine, something i'm now in, not looking at it all from the outside. and when i pulled off the pch onto topanga canyon blvd, i felt like aaaaah. really at home. the windey canyon roads feel safer to me now, i trust myself and the decisions i'm making. i'm making friends with people i really like, people that make me laugh and inspire me. i feel good about getting purusha people out here where it belongs. i trust los angeles to be good to me, if i'm good to her.

i know things don't magically become all good and easy, that's for sure. shit's gonna happen, nothing's perfect, and no location can fix that. i'm just saying with the accumulation of time, our little wooden house deep in the canyons of topanga is feeling quite like home these days.

runway inspired and the evolution of purusha.

donna karan

recently i've been calling purusha people clothing 'dreamy high fashion yoga-active-lounge wear', because i feel like what comfy clothes need are a little more style. i've always wanted to be the kind of woman that is super stylish and lovely, rocking heels and mini dresses, always on trend but true to herself. but sometimes life gets in the way of (at least for me!) putting together that awesome outfit because i'm running around, busy working, running errands, literally running (lol), and practicing yoga. from the start, the foundation of my business has been to create work out wear that doesn't look like exercise clothing, and doesn't even have to be worn for working out. a problem i've had, well maybe it's not a problem, just a social faux pas, is i am addicted to wearing yoga pants. addicted. when i wear jeans now it's kinda a big deal. and i secretly wish i was in my spandex. so my mission is to never get out of those yoga pants again! muahhaha!! kinda kidding, kinda not. 

but seriously, i am so driven to make clothing that is as comfy as it is cool. and as human/eco-friendly as it is stylish. i google eco-friendly active wear from time to time, and ugh it is always such a disappointment. boxy, embarrassingly shapeless and unfeminine, the clothing just looks like it's made for the woman who has given up on style to support the environment. this should NEVER be the case. ah! the opposite is true. green is in, we all know, and green garments need to be as beautiful as the movement it supports. so what's a planet loving, yoga pants addict, fashion lusting gal to do?

follow fashion, get into it, and mold it into MY vision. so lookout for more runway inspired yoga/lounge clothing in the future here at purusha people! i'm excited, and i hope you are too!

thanks for reading and sharing in my dreams, as always. i am so grateful for you. xo.

 style icon blogger chiara of the blonde salad

 giles

 kinder aggugini

 calvin klein

my favorite, ralph lauren

all beings free.

c/o sydney haliburton

all beings free has become somewhat of a mantra for purusha people. it's a core value for my business, yet i can't help but sometimes feel overwhelmed with the amount of un-free beings out there that i can't help.

i love yoga, as most of us do. at the end of class teachers sometimes say a blessing, which i am so thankful for. because i am beyond blessed, and i can take those words and actually apply them to my life. sadly though, a lot of people can't do this. no matter how positive someone thinks, how much they focus on love and goodness, and watch as the emotions move through the body, the bad stuff just doesn't go away. and i can't really even understand this as an american woman that hasn't ever suffered any monumental injustices. sure, shit has happened to me, but it's just small turds compared to the massive diarrhea others have gone through. ugh totally gross visual there, but the words just kinda happened. sorry. yes i know we can't compare pain, it's all pain, but honestly i know there is a pain that i have never experienced, and many of us haven't. the suffering of being raped, being tortured in war, losing your whole family in an accident, watching someone you love be killed. i can't. even. imagine. life sometimes just baffles me. it can lift you up and fill your heart with love and light, and it can bury you in fear and rip your heart from your chest. and in the end, you die. we all die. wtf?! i can almost understand the appeal of religion to soothe this reality.

the funny thing (well not funny at all, actually terribly sad) that got me thinking about the freedom of beings is the vast number of dogs that need homes and are waiting to be adopted. you all know i LOVE LOVE LOVE liam my doggie, maybe in an unhealthy way. recently i've really been wanting to give another dog a happy home with us. so i've been cruising adoptapet.com and crying about how many precious dogs don't have someone to love them. there are thousands and thousands of them, and i don't need to worry if i can't adopt right now, because there will still be thousands this time next year. ugh, my heart, it hurts. i wish i could protect and love all the dogs. and to further bash my heart in, most of them will be euthanized. it's not fair. these little babies didn't do anything wrong, and they just want to live and be happy. patrick, always the rational dude that sees the big picture, looks over at me crying and says, "just think about all the children that need to be adopted, and the mass suffering of humans everyday too. life is cruel for so many." dogs are easy to care about because they're cute and cuddly, but what about that 12 year old kid that lives in a foster home with all her baggage? shouldn't i want to rescue her too?

so i turned on imagine by john lennon. i wish we could all care for each other and live in peace. but wishing won't do it. i can only do what i can do with my small 2 hands. and that will have to be good enough. i can't save and love them all. one thing though i know i will be doing is donating a portion of all my purusha people sales to a cause, i just don't know what yet. i am drawn to donate to LA animal rescue, but i'd like to donate to something that benefits the freedom of humans as well. let me know if you have any ideas.

i hope i wasn't a bummer on you. if anything, let us be soooo happy and blissful for the luck we've been given to live in happiness and freedom. they aren't rights yet, though they should be. my goal in this short life, before the epic death, is to make whatever moves i can to bring the pursuit of happiness to all beings that i may encounter. namaste. 

boyfriend jam.

yeah... he's a keeper.. ;)

“So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more damaging to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man's living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun.” 

~Christopher McCandless

who am i missing?

good morning!

this morning after my ritual of reflecting over my business, i almost feel a little shameful. and discriminatory. no good. i've realized (oh god, duh!) i've been a bad business owner. but that's all about to change. i've neglected people when the core of my business is my love of the customer. i've ignorantly forgotten we are all not the same size and shape. this has been a complaint of the fashion industry since its beginning- we are all not a size 0!! it is time, finally, to listen to this powerful fact. like it or not clothing brands, the reality is plus size people want to wear your clothing and they can't. soooo many beautiful voluptuous women want to practice yoga and feel beautiful and true to themselves while doing it. they want to exercise, take care of themselves, and look hot, just like anyone else. so why discriminate? why not make their size? it's really kinda mind boggling to ignore your customers. purusha people is coming out with a 'plus size' line for spring 2013. and it's gonna be amazing. i'm excited! AND i'm going to be working on a men's yoga/work out wear line for 2013 as well. no one should be left out. purusha is inclusivity. i almost felt like i was 80% sure about my business, but something was missing. someone was missing. now i know. and i feel 100%. :)

cold calls.

you guys. this morning i began doing what i've been a little scared of doing- calling stores and speaking to buyers. after a few stutters and awkward word phrasing on the first call, i relaxed a bit. the funny thing i always learn is, most people are nice and want you to succeed too! phew! my plan is to move purusha people from being just online to at stores too! and really cool stores, i've been scoping it out :).

so i have to send samples to some places for spring 2013. please let me know if you have any favorite items you think i should send! i feel really torn, especially because i'm coming out with a new collection in about a month, and like those items so much too... really any input is totally helpful. you all have great taste and know what you want, so feel free to give me any advice!

thank you my dears!! today i feel good. i didn't feel like the calls were cold either. they were actually really warm. xo.

nostalgia sets in.

photo i took from fall 2007 at great pond, CT

something about not being in new england for fall this year is making me very emotional. it could also be that it's that time of the month. i dunno. but i feel soooo nostalgic, and just wishy washy. i cried to patrick a little this morning about the fact that we can't move backwards in time. those moments that i didn't even realize were special are gone, only alive in a coma in my memories. rational patrick helps a bit, telling me that, like most people, i have survivor ship bias, or i am only choosing to remember the good and forget all the bad. 

yes, this seems to be true, but i still feel a little sad. i miss when patrick and i first met in the spring of 2007 in simsbury, ct. we both lived at home, i didn't have a job. my only job was to spend time with patrick and fall in love. and paint pictures. and write poems in my childhood bedroom. i told patrick that i missed those carefree days, and ha, patrick said, "we were ignorant, we didn't know we were adults that should have been working and not living at home. you were 23!", and "didn't you long for more though?". all true, but i really needed that time to figure out what i wanted to do with my precious time. 

patrick and i, that summer and fall of 2007, we just rode bikes, ate food together, went on hikes, and learned about who we were. it was so sacred. i tear up to think we can't ever go hang out in patrick's room again (his family doesn't live there anymore), and we can't ride down his road at night and look at all the fireflies. that time is gone. 

and then when we moved in together 2 years later in collinsville, ct. i find myself missing that too. we were both working more then, but still, we had this safety there, this feeling like we were still young and free. our families were nearby, lots of friends down the street, and plenty of time to spend exploring life together. again, patrick just told me "that house was dark, you wanted to move and try something different, and we knew we couldn't stay some place because it was easy." yes, pat, right again. maybe another day i will be so rational. but not today.

the funny/crazy/stupid thing is, i fully know someday i will look back at our time here in topanga and think... i wish i could go back. to when things were simpler. time is a concept none of us trapped in existence bound by time can understand. all i can understand are my feelings of attachment to moments gone by... and try in this moment to be hugely grateful that those people in the memories i miss are still here with me, safe and sound. 

we have to move forward, life is change. i'm not sure though i will ever be able to think back without a few tears mourning what was and can never be again. but that's natural right? i have a feeling i will be a weepy old woman someday, crying when i'm happy, sad, nostalgic... if i can't understand time, at least i can feel it. i can feel it.

i'll drive.

last night (or this morning) i kept having a repetitive dream. i'd wake for a bit and then go right back in it. why does this only happen in the stupid and scary dreams? in the dream i was in a hurry and driving through burlington, VT somehow mixed with the scenery of canton and simsbury, CT. typical, 'some nights' by fun was playing on the radio. the main thing i remember from the dream was being in the driver's seat, and then getting scared and pulling myself over to the passenger seat. but then i would be even more scared because i wasn't controlling the car, just watching it begin to swerve into the other lane. so i jumped back over to the driver seat and drove for a bit, then got scared again that i wasn't a good driver and dove into the passenger seat. over and over. trapped in a crazy roller coaster car ride blasting that increasingly annoying song. this dream seemed so silly in the brief moments i woke up to roll over in bed, but now as i think about it, it's very meaningful for me. often i tell myself habitual stories of fear and worry and i feel like i can't be a leader. but then the thought of being a follower, a mere passenger while no one is driving is about a 1000 times more unsettling. i posted a photo on my purusha facebook page last night that said, "decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it". maybe this conjured up my dream. it can be frightening to face the fears that come up when you make moves toward your goals. but truly i know that those tiny fears don't feel nearly as bad as regret, or dissatisfaction with yourself for letting the coward take the wheel. and, fear is natural. there is nothing wrong with a little fear. driving is dangerous, and we have to be cautious. but the point of life, and my dream, is to get real comfortable with what scares you. it is the only way to happiness. today i'm thinking i would much rather be in the driver seat and realize the strong, passionate, brave woman that i am! namaste.

less is more.

with how easy it is to be busy and accumulate possessions and thoughts and to do lists, often i have to remind myself less is more. simplicity is a magic wand that causes worries and clutter of the mind and the body to disappear. we don't need more. we have enough. the day needs less busyness and more moments of space and deep breaths and hugs. i don't need to run so hard, work myself silly, or let my mind's thoughts cloudy up the sunshine of my brain. we need less. namaste.

a purusha person.

this long weekend has been really a nice time to think about purusha, and how i envision the brand. {i'm going to hold off on my kickstarter launch for a bit until i have a few things sorted out!}

i adore asking the question: WHO is a purusha person? over time my definition will change, but right now because i am mainly targetting 21-50 year old women (give or take), a purusha person is a woman. not just any woman though. she is, above all, kind. and from her kindness comes beauty. she is savoir faire (in love with this term), or adaptable and adroit, knowing what to do in any situation. especially the current situation of our time. now is the moment for awareness and compassion. a purusha woman is aware of the world around her, and the effect she has on the planet. yet she isn't preachy, but simply lives by example. she cares about what she supports with her dollar; because she worked really hard for it, and because she believes in freedom and happiness as a universe-given right. a purusha woman loves being current, be it fashion or food or architecture, but again not at the expense of other beings. she loves her family, spends time everyday in nature, is inspired by the beach and the mountains, dreams of travelling to far off places, and takes pride in her body and mind by exercising, meditating, and practicing yoga. our woman is fully well rounded- intelligent, curious, sensual, lovely, funny, non-dramatic, creative, humble, and shares her love with each person she meets.

i love this lady! and lucky me, she is my customer. no wonder my buyers become my friends and are some of the sweetest people i've met! thank for inspiring me to make clothing worthy of you. namaste.